If you didn’t watch this video yet you should. It is short and hilarious.
He starts talking about how much people change when they get married. Everything you thought was cute as you were dating, is just plain annoying when you are married. How should you respond to the person you married if they are not like the person you are married to? The most common way is that you decide you made the wrong choice and start looking for you “soul” mate.
The deep question is ” What if instead of looking at marriage as a contract designed to make you happy, you begin to see marriage as a covenant designed to help one another grow out of sins, flaws and shortcomings and into the person that God desires for you to be?”
You should view marriage as a way to help you grow. Instead of looking for a way out, you should dive into to the work of marriage. You should be helping to shape your spouse and allow your spouse to shape you. What tools can you use to shape your spouse?
What you will want to do is talk to your spouse about what they need to do to change. Instead of being mean and bring out all the flaws of your spouse. You will want to speak to them with love.
If you look deeply into your spouse and their flaws you will start to see yourself. He gave an example of how his wife was so optimistic and cheery. He was the opposite and was pessimistic. He dampened her fire. He started to see himself reflected in her behavior. He didn’t like himself or the world and it rubbed off on her.
This all goes back to the relationship of Christ and the church. That should shape all relationships. Marriage can shape you, and if you give up too soon you will never reach your highest potential.
If you hate how you are and you hate how you treat your spouse, just know that it is all because of your life being filled with sin. Just know that it is not truly you or your spouse acting that way. You are all in the middle of transforming. If you view your spouse as the person meant to make you happy then it will never last. You should view it as an awesome opportunity to help your spouse reach their full potential.
I hope you will listen to the whole message and join me next week. A few more weeks in this series.